Wired & Tired

Denny left for Anchorage this afternoon in a Suburban loaded with people. The visitors will be boarding flights Outside tonight and tomorrow, and he will be heading back out to Cold Bay. It is nice for him to have some company on that long (five-hour) drive--he has made it so many times over the years alone.

I thought I would enjoy having the house back to myself but I am inexplicably lonely in what should be welcomed solitude.

I'm wandering around the the house at loose ends, aimless. Unable to concentrate. Unable to sit still. The pile of tapes on top of the VCR mock me. I don't know if I am ready to hear that voice again, to watch the play of expressions across his face. It is suddenly too real.

It's a bit like the day-after-Christmas feeling you have as a kid. A strange mixture of elation and depression.

But you have to take what life gives you and make the most of it.

If nothing else--the future has suddenly gotten a tad more interesting.

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